i can't stop watching sportscenter

more etcetera to report:

first, i would like to announce my sinceeeeeere thanks and love for alexander graham bell whose invention has allowed me to take care of all of my class scheduling problems while sitting on my bum in my pjs! yes! and then to al gore for inventing the internet for the same reason.

second, i was so annoyed that eli manning came back against the eagles sunday. eli manning is a boil on the butt of humanity. i couldn't help but think that jessie's mom must have been in a foul mood after the giants came back from their deserved spot 17 points behind the eagles to win on OT. i spit on them.
Yesterday I had my second speed reading course and missed the charger game AGAIN, and i'm starting to think it should be my new suspersititious strategy because they killed, skinned, annihilated the tenessee titans. charge!!! 66% of teams who start out 2-0 make it to the playoffs! oh, chris berman is still my favorite sportscaster. i ruv him. and i hate to admit that terrell owens, while a big a-hole primadonna who should have no place in the nfl, is extremely attractive. i bet he has access to lots of low quality ladies.

can someone tell me why nascar is considered a sport? i mean, i get that car racing is entertaining...but a sport? hmmm.

my speed reading teacher looks exactly like nicholas cage in his raising arizona days. it's sort of creepy. i keep expecting him to freak out, but he remains even keeled thus far. not everyone can say they learned speed reading from nic cage. i wonder if he has a statutory asian bride. one of the girls in my class looks like emily parrino. so i assumed she was smart. that's what i get for assuming.

best quote from a sportscenter commercial today: "it's monday night, so go ahead and invite that guy that your wife doesnt like, but who you've defended for years as being an OK guy."

corinne and i were discussing today the feasability of finding a man who likes watching football inside, also likes doing outdoor activities, is intelligent, loves pancakes, and is sensitive/christian. we posit that our expectations might be too high.