janitors are cool, man.

a man just came into my conference room wearing a suit and cologne that still lingers, 15 minutes after he left. he sat down and i said "hi, how are you...are you going to work here?" you know, making polite chat i don't have to make, but do because i don't want to make him feel awkward. he says "yeah, maybe part-time, some janitorial stuff, gotta clean this place up" and i say "oh, nice" and he says "i'm just kidding." and i say "hilarious" and if you know the many definitions of hilarious, you would know that hilarious in this situation meant "heinous" because, dude, it's not cool to act like you're all above being a janitor. f off, man. you come in wearing your suit and half a bottle of cologne and i'm supposed to think you cant be a janitor? whatever.

we have a flavia machine at work. i like to make iced coffees. so i am responsible for filling up the ice trays when they run low. we have these weird ice trays with lids--presumably, you fill it through the lid, less mess, yay. hmm, yes, well, i managed to make a solid inch thick layer of ice on top of the trays. it was impossible to break. i'm like, where is jet li when you need him?

in other news, i think my daily debate over whether the powdered frothy milk topping is more or less healthy than putting mini-moo creamer in my coffee is probably moot. they are both death--one in powder form and one in a mysterious liquid milk-product-that-somehow-doesnt need-to-be-refrigerated form. speaking of death, when i do my prayer relaxation exercises at my desk and become attuned to the sounds around me i realize that i can not only hear multiple computers whirring, but also the air conditioner and the refrigerator and the cars outside. i live in an artifical world.

bwahahaha, my boss just came in and the Mutterer muttered something and my boss was like "are you talking to me or to yourself, because sometimes i talk to myself , but i don't want an answer." hilarious and very diplomatic. adore.

i will have a cell phone number by tomorrow. you can thank julia and jon and their effective methods of asian persuasion for this.